


Family Values

by LindsayBay



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Family, Family Feels, Gen, Yondu Udonta Lives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-16
Updated: 2017-07-16
Packaged: 2018-12-03 00:37:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11520843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LindsayBay/pseuds/LindsayBay
Summary: AU where Peter and Yondu disagree about how to properly parent baby Groot.





	Family Values

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally written just for Tumblr, but it was received so well there, I figured I'd post it here, too.

“I am Groot!”

“Whadya bring me, twig?” Yondu squinted at what Groot placed in his hand.

“I am Groot.”

“Yeah, yeah, it  _is_  shiny. But, uhhhhhh, it’s a candy wrapper.” And it wasn’t even good candy.

“I am Groot?”

“Nah, nah, I ain’t mad. Jus’… look for shiny things made out of metal. And fancy rocks.” Yondu watched as little Groot shinnied up a drainpipe and squeezed in through a vent, entering the hotel where the Dowager Empress of Chi Persei and her retinue were staying. The Dowager Empress was famous for her collection of jewelry, which included several ultra-rare supernova opals set in platinum. Just one of those pieces, and Yondu could retire in style. He was thinking of a nice tropical island. Maybe on Terra; the women there were crazy for his big blue–

“Everybody was kung-fu fighting, those kicks were fast as lightning, HYAH!” Peter was bopping down the street, listening to his Zune and doing martial arts moves. “S ‘up, Papa Smurf! HYAH!” He playfully kicked at Yondu.

“Thought we agreed to never talk ‘bout that.” 

“Whatever you say, Daddy-o.”

Geez. Yondu would never have revealed so much of his feelings for Peter if he’d known he wasn’t going to die. All this ‘papa’ this and ‘daddy’ that… Yondu was not built to deal with this much affection. 

“I am Groot!” The twiglet held up a platinum bracelet set with six supernova opal cabochons. The gems burned brilliantly in the night, coruscating in colors that Yondu didn’t even have names for.

_Crap_. “Um, bad Groot. Yah put those back where yah found them, yah hear?” Saying this caused Yondu physical pain. That bracelet would have gotten him his own island in the Pacific and who knows how many big-butted Earth girls.

“I am Groot!” Groot stamped a tiny foot.

Peter popped out his earbuds. “You’re teaching Groot to steal for you?”

“Course not! He’s jus’ a, um, klepto-whatsit.”

“ _I am Groot_!” Groot was hopping up and down in outrage.

“You think that’s what grampas do? Teach their grandbabies to be criminals?”

Yondu threw his arms up in the air. “How the hell would I know? I was raised in a damn cage!”

Peter picked Groot up and cuddled him. “You come with me, little one. I’m going to teach you some morals.” He glared at Yondu and stomped away.

“Kin I have the bracelet?” Yondu asked plaintively.

………….

Karglin sat on the bar stool next to him. “What’s wrong, bossman?”

Yondu was half-way to blackout drunk and working hard at getting the rest of the way there. “Yah got family?”

“Somewhere, I guess. Haven’t seen them for a while.” 

Yondu took another swig of his drink. “Might be yer better off.” The bartender handed Yondu a drink in a tall, smoking glass with a pink umbrella and a crazy-straw sticking out of it. “I din’t order this.”

“It’s from that guy over there.” The bartender pointed.

Yondu turned to look, and there was Peter with Groot on his shoulder. He waved at Yondu with a rueful smile on his face. He got up and walked to the bar. “I’m sorry. I forget that you really don’t have any parenting role models. You’re doing the best you know how.”

“I am Groot, “ Groot added.

Yondu stalled for time by clearing his throat. He’d forgotten how Pleiadean-style whiskey made him melancholy. Because of course it was the alcohol that was making his eyes sting.

“Aren’t you going to drink that, Pops?” Peter indicated the smoking drink. Yondu picked it up and took a big gulp. And immediately started choking.

“I thought you would use the straw!” Peter yelled in a panic. He threw his arms around Yondu from the back and drove his clasped hands into Yondu’s solar plexus. Yondu’s mouth flew open and a bracelet shot out, hitting the wall behind the bar hard enough to leave a dent. The bartender grimaced as he used a towel to pick up the bracelet and set it on the bar. 

Yondu picked up the bracelet and grinned as he watched the colors flow and burn in the opals. “Yer a good son, Peter.” 

“Love you too, Papa Bear.”


End file.
